Jim’s Smokehouse, or probably more accurately ‘some guy with a generic name’s garage’ is located on Goose Gate in Hockley, however this is one place that doesn’t belong in the Nottingham’s bohemian quarter, unless there are plans to level it and use it as car park that is.
We decided to dine on a Thursday before heading to the Capital FM Arena and had heard mixed reviews before going there. One person who knew a friend of a friend who worked there had even said it was ‘fine to eat there, but don’t order the ribs’. Now I’m a firm believer in not listening to hearsay and trying everything for yourself however in this case, I really should have heeded peoples’ advice.
We entered Jim’s around 6pm to find the restaurant almost completely empty. We waited around a minute before a member of staff showed us to a seat, a minute which felt like an eternity when the place was that empty. The waitress took our drinks order, 1 lager and 1 cider around £3.70 eachr and left us to peruse the me nu whilst she went to fetch them. There is A LOT of rib meals on the menu. That’s not to say there weren’t other things but it did seem like this was their speciality, or not, as I’d been warned. We decided to opt for some BBQ jumbo wings (£4.45) to share as a starter and a BBQ pulled pork burger and a pulled chicken meal for our mains priced at £8.95 and £9.95.
After the waitress returned with our drinks and took our order it became only too obvious what kind of a place we were in. We seemed to be sitting in someone’s garage: Minimal decoration and a sort of eerie, emptiness as if this was some sort of restaurant graveyard, and to an extent, it is. The remnants of Red Hot Buffet Shack that used to occupy this space can still be seen on the toilet and exit signs which is just pure laziness if you’re trying to put your own stamp on a place. It also becomes abundantly clear that this establishment is a succubus for anything resembling an atmosphere. I’ve honestly been to livelier funerals. This soulless car-hold that someone has had the gall to call a restaurant, is shamefully depressing. With nothing going on around the restaurant and the same 3 Red Hot Chilli Peppers songs playing on a loop on the sound system, my meal could not arrive quick enough.
After spending what seemed like an eternity in limbo (not quite Hell as I imagine it would be more interesting) our starters arrived. I should also mention that the starters arrived around 10 minutes after ordering, I was just so bored I had lost all concept of time. The chicken wings were actually quite good. Succulent and moist chicken met with a smoky BBQ sauce which for a minute made me think that Jim’s could really redeem itself.
After finishing our starters another 5 minutes/lifetime in limbo past and our mains arrived. The BBQ pulled pork was surprisingly good: tender and with that signature smoky BBQ flavour but the problems came from the rest of the meal. The burger was dryer than your mouth after eating a mouthful of cinnamon powder and the coleslaw was just confusing. Perhaps I am just common and am used to being served coleslaw consisting of diced vegetables covered in mayonnaise. This was more like undercooked vegetables served in way too much pepper. The fries were also of poor quality, consisting more of grease and salt than potato. The chicken ordered was also mouth-dehydratingly dry (sense a pattern here?) and the accompaniments much the same as that of the burger, or Hoagie as Jim likes to call a burger.
The staff here have also had their soul sucked. I don’t blame them really considering how difficult it must be to work at Jim’s every day and not jump into the Trent wearing concrete shoes but it really doesn’t help considering the rest of this eateries flaws. They will do the bare minimum: ask the right questions because they’ve been told to and are fairly efficient in the service they provide but if you want anything even close genuine, then you won’t find it hear.
Overall Jim’s BBQ Smokehouse is mind-numblingly terrible. This is principally down to the fact that it is utterly devoid of atmosphere. The staff don’t want to be there, I doubt the diners really wanted to be there so it leaves me wondering why this restaurant even exists? Rub, another BBQ restaurant about 5 minutes’ walk away, is the complete opposite of Jim’s and thrives, so why come here? Jim’s BBQ Jokehouse is a shining example everything an eatery shouldn’t be so the only reason I can think of coming here is if you are planning to open your own restaurant, just do the opposite and I’m sure you’ll have a successful business. I recommend this place to no one. Go to Rub instead, it’s excellent.
The Food Sheriff of Nottingham 